Psychiatry field, weight control industry and cosmetic industry tell us all the time that our feelings, needs and desires are not important. People are told their hunger cues are not real, that those cues are just cravings not hunger.
People do this all the time to people who feel a certain way. If you have been diagnosed with BPd, depression,anxiety, etc. that is all they blame anything on. If you are grouchy, it's because you have BPD not because the person was taunting you and saying rude things to you about how crazy you are all day long. When people prank you and trigger you and say it's only a joke and then blame you for being too sensitive is another big thing among people who have BPD, anxiety and depression. It is always our fault we reacted the way we did, it is never the other person was being horrific to us. We always have to sit back and take it, because if not we reacted because we are crazy and sensitive.
Anytime something amazing happens and we become very happy we are told it's because we are in a manic state, but if it happens to a "normal" person it's because they are just happy. Once you are seen as insane, everything you do is minimized. Normal human emotions are seen as a result of your BPD, or depression,etc. People will probably minimize this whole post and the feelings of others by saying "well if they can't handle it..." well I bet if the situation was revered you would get really butthurt. That is how abusers work, they can dish it, but can't take it.
Anytime something amazing happens and we become very happy we are told it's because we are in a manic state, but if it happens to a "normal" person it's because they are just happy. Once you are seen as insane, everything you do is minimized. Normal human emotions are seen as a result of your BPD, or depression,etc. People will probably minimize this whole post and the feelings of others by saying "well if they can't handle it..." well I bet if the situation was revered you would get really butthurt. That is how abusers work, they can dish it, but can't take it.
You can't possibly be happy with your size,
"You must get leaner, (even if you are already thin), become more muscular - you look too scrawny" are just a few ways our bodies and feelings about our bodies are minimized. Telling us that we must just be telling ourselves we are happy but we really aren't when we aren't lean, or muscular enough is society's way of minimizing your emotions and how you feel about your body.
"It's okay, fat people need to lose weight anyway"
Telling someone they don't have an eating disorder because they aren't big enough, or they aren't small enough, or they eat healthy so they must not have one is minimizing the impacts of how serious an eating disorder and body dysmorphia really is. Telling people dieting is okay because fat people have to be lean is minimizing an eating disorder and body dysmorphia. Telling someone that eating less is fine because they don't fit into society's standards of health and beauty is minimizing serious issues that can lead to death.
You could be the healthiest person on the planet and someone will say it's not healthy enough, or not thin enough to be happy or you must not have the strength or willpower to want to change. So what even if you don't, not all of us need to be happy, thin, beautiful/handsome people, can't we just be ourselves fat/thin and crazy and ugly. Maybe we don't want to change, but that is seen as "bad" in our society, downplaying our ability to be happy with ourselves for who we really are.
Wikipedia states that abuses will use "claiming altruistic motives" (which I'll write a blog post about) as a tactic to "downplay positive attributes (talents and skills etc.) of their victims" is the best way to put it. Remind you of anyone? "But... fat people can't be healthy even though you are in the Olympics and a marathon runner football player" "You might be healthy now, but what about when you're older" as if a certain body type lives forever. They are using tactics to minimize you feeling good about yourself. They want to control your weight and how you feel about your own body. Don't let them, it may be tempting to think they are right, but that is what abusers want you to think.
"You must get leaner, (even if you are already thin), become more muscular - you look too scrawny" are just a few ways our bodies and feelings about our bodies are minimized. Telling us that we must just be telling ourselves we are happy but we really aren't when we aren't lean, or muscular enough is society's way of minimizing your emotions and how you feel about your body.
"It's okay, fat people need to lose weight anyway"
Telling someone they don't have an eating disorder because they aren't big enough, or they aren't small enough, or they eat healthy so they must not have one is minimizing the impacts of how serious an eating disorder and body dysmorphia really is. Telling people dieting is okay because fat people have to be lean is minimizing an eating disorder and body dysmorphia. Telling someone that eating less is fine because they don't fit into society's standards of health and beauty is minimizing serious issues that can lead to death.
You could be the healthiest person on the planet and someone will say it's not healthy enough, or not thin enough to be happy or you must not have the strength or willpower to want to change. So what even if you don't, not all of us need to be happy, thin, beautiful/handsome people, can't we just be ourselves fat/thin and crazy and ugly. Maybe we don't want to change, but that is seen as "bad" in our society, downplaying our ability to be happy with ourselves for who we really are.
Wikipedia states that abuses will use "claiming altruistic motives" (which I'll write a blog post about) as a tactic to "downplay positive attributes (talents and skills etc.) of their victims" is the best way to put it. Remind you of anyone? "But... fat people can't be healthy even though you are in the Olympics and a marathon runner football player" "You might be healthy now, but what about when you're older" as if a certain body type lives forever. They are using tactics to minimize you feeling good about yourself. They want to control your weight and how you feel about your own body. Don't let them, it may be tempting to think they are right, but that is what abusers want you to think.
Genitalia size has been an issue for a while, and humiliating others directly and indirectly and then claiming it was a joke is the worst thing to contribute to body image issues. Genitalia is a touchy, sensitive subject for we want to impress our partners and we want to be accepted, especially by people we want to be sexually intimate with. Similar to fatness, and aesthetics we are told if we don't like what we see to just change it, minimizing our body dysmorphia for society's standards. Why must we change ourselves to fit in? Especially getting surgery that can cause damage to our parts instead of listening and validate someone's concerns and try to help them feel better about who they are, not who they should be. We minimize a serious self-hatred issue and push them to fit in with everyone else for our own selfish desires. You genitalia is fine, it's everyone else with the issue.
Similar to the text above, people who are seen as ugly or desirable are never believed when they say they are comfortable with who they are. And even if they are not, their well being and safety is minimized by the push of plastic surgery. Our thoughts of happiness are squashed when we try to feel better about ourselves. With questions about if we want someone to love us, or why don't we want to fit in with the beautiful people, ugly people need to face minimization of their feelings all the time. If we do feel sad about being ugly we are told to change instead of accepting who we are, and then we will be happy but only if we change. If we are sad it's not because relationships suck, it's because of our looks and we can't find a good partner if we aren't attractive, according to society. Ugly people are told just get a nose job, or some surgery instead of fixing their inner issues with body dysmorphia or help them realize they are enough.
Now that you know about minimization, please be aware of this tactic if it is done to you. People will minimize your feelings, desires and wants and needs for their own selfish reasons. Our of all the numerous abusive tactics, to me, minimizing and gaslighting are the two worst ones for they are used specificity by the abuser to get what they want, not what is best for you.
Reference
Wikipedia. (2017, June 01). Minimisation (psychology). Retrieved June 07, 2017, from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minimisation_(psychology)
WOW. (n.d.). Minimisation (psychology). Retrieved June 07, 2017, from http://www.wow.com/wiki/Minimisation_(psychology
Abuse Wikia. (n.d.). Minimisation (psychology). Retrieved June 07, 2017, from http://abuse.wikia.com/wiki/Minimisation_(psychology)
Wikipedia. (2017, June 01). Minimisation (psychology). Retrieved June 07, 2017, from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minimisation_(psychology)
WOW. (n.d.). Minimisation (psychology). Retrieved June 07, 2017, from http://www.wow.com/wiki/Minimisation_(psychology
Abuse Wikia. (n.d.). Minimisation (psychology). Retrieved June 07, 2017, from http://abuse.wikia.com/wiki/Minimisation_(psychology)